The pandemic made me realize how much I love being a hockey parent

Editor’s note: This post was updated on October 19, 2021

Hand sanitizer, taped-up arrows, and quizzical looks as masked parents tried to recognize each other. Our first day back at hockey practice this season was once again different from years past.

There were still no hugs or handshakes, and no lingering around the arena lobby, exclaiming how each other’s kids “grew so much over the summer!”   

Despite all the guidelines, it was energizing being back at one of our regular activities. Life felt almost normal for that hour while the kids were on the ice.

Being a hockey parent is about so much more than hockey

As I sat in the stands watching the players go through their drills, I was struck by how much I’d missed our local sports community, as well as hockey and its rituals.

After seven years of driving to and from early morning practices, travelling through blizzards to reach far-off tournaments, and tense hours squished into hard seats, you’d think I might be over the, um, glamour of being a hockey parent. But actually, I’ve found myself more involved in the sport and wondering lately how many more years we have left at the rink.


Related read: Celebrating all you parents who make sport happen for your kids


Christine Latreille’s oldest son

I watched my not-so-little 12-year-old, and felt rather misty-eyed.

“He’ll be big enough to drive himself here soon!” someone called out from across the cordoned-off stands.

I agreed, and laughed a bit too heartily. Wait, what?

Yup, one day he won’t need his parents for a ride, and will be off on his own. And I’ll miss the dark morning drives when we talk about nothing and everything. Or the head-thumping, heart-pounding music we wail along with on the way to games.

I’ll miss the little rituals that are all my own: savouring a jarringly strong arena coffee early in the morning and trying out all the variations of canteen poutine. Wearing my threadbare Hockey Mom socks at away tournaments, and the nervous pacing I do as the team manager while waiting for the game buzzer to go off.

The cold arenas and too-small seats might make my back sore, but I thrill at watching his confidence, resilience, and skills improve each season. All driven by my son’s love of hockey.


Related read: A reluctant hockey mom shares tips for becoming a healthy sport parent


I’ll take being a sports parent, for as long as I can

When hockey was cancelled in March 2020 due to COVID-19, I tried to support my kids through their loss of school and sports by staying active with driveway hockey, inline skating, and online hockey resources.

But what we all missed the most were the traditions and in-person connections.

For the players, it’s the handshakes and fist bumps, locker room chants, AC/DC blasting in the dressing room. And for us parents, the watching, cheering, and commiserating.

For families, it’s the familiar songs and chants in the stands, special treats when the fun is done, a familiar phrase, or those good-luck tokens that need to be tucked somewhere safe.

These small customs repeated countless times unify players and families through hours of practice and help build close connections that can last long after the Zamboni has passed.

Four years after her son “graduated” from his Grade 12 team, Active for Life contributor Susan Scandiffio still gets together with the moms from his team for a monthly brunch. They recently participated in the Terry Fox Run together for their eighth straight year.


Related read: Could I become a hockey mom?


Being a sports parent is time-consuming, tiring, and not always fun. But I wouldn’t change one minute of it.

I’ll be waking up at 6 a.m. to be in those stands, mouthing along to their chants, and doling out snacks for as long as I can.

2 responses to “The pandemic made me realize how much I love being a hockey parent

  1. Brought a tear to my eye too. I agree meeting with friends regularly coupled with good healthy
    outdoor activity is hard to beat.

  2. Made me tear up! They grow up so fast. Rituals are so important – on the rink and in the stands – to bring people together.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

[gravityforms id=12 title="false" description="false" ajax="true"]
<div class='gf_browser_chrome gform_wrapper gform_legacy_markup_wrapper' id='gform_wrapper_12' ><div id='gf_12' class='gform_anchor' tabindex='-1'></div><form method='post' enctype='multipart/form-data' target='gform_ajax_frame_12' id='gform_12' action='/pandemic-hockey-parent/#gf_12' > <div class='gform_body gform-body'><ul id='gform_fields_12' class='gform_fields top_label form_sublabel_below description_below'><li id="field_12_6" class="gfield field_sublabel_below field_description_below hidden_label gfield_visibility_visible" ><label class='gfield_label' for='input_12_6' >Nom</label><div class='ginput_container ginput_container_text'><input name='input_6' id='input_12_6' type='text' value='' class='large' placeholder='Votre nom' aria-invalid="false" /> </div></li><li id="field_12_7" class="gfield email gfield_contains_required field_sublabel_below field_description_below hidden_label gfield_visibility_visible" ><label class='gfield_label' for='input_12_7' >Courriel<span class="gfield_required"><span class="gfield_required gfield_required_asterisk">*</span></span></label><div class='ginput_container ginput_container_email'> <input name='input_7' id='input_12_7' type='text' value='' class='large' placeholder='Votre adresse courriel' aria-required="true" aria-invalid="false" /> </div></li><li id="field_12_9" class="gfield hidden scroll-subscriber field_sublabel_below field_description_below gfield_visibility_visible" ><label class='gfield_label' for='input_12_9' >Scroll Subscriber</label><div class='ginput_container ginput_container_text'><input name='input_9' id='input_12_9' type='text' value='' class='medium' aria-invalid="false" /> </div></li><li id="field_12_8" class="gfield field_sublabel_below field_description_below hidden_label gfield_visibility_visible" ><label class='gfield_label gfield_label_before_complex' >Je suis un éducateur, un entraîneur ou un animateur en loisirs</label><div class='ginput_container ginput_container_checkbox'><ul class='gfield_checkbox' id='input_12_8'><li class='gchoice gchoice_12_8_1'> <input class='gfield-choice-input' name='input_8.1' type='checkbox' value='Oui, veuillez aussi m’envoyer l’infolettre semestrielle d’Actif pour la vie pour les professionnels.' id='choice_12_8_1' /> <label for='choice_12_8_1' id='label_12_8_1'>Oui, veuillez aussi m’envoyer l’infolettre semestrielle d’Actif pour la vie pour les professionnels.</label> </li></ul></div></li></ul></div> <div class='gform_footer top_label'> <input type='submit' id='gform_submit_button_12' class='gform_button button' value='Abonnez-vous à notre bulletin' onclick='if(window["gf_submitting_12"]){return false;} window["gf_submitting_12"]=true; ' onkeypress='if( event.keyCode == 13 ){ if(window["gf_submitting_12"]){return false;} window["gf_submitting_12"]=true; jQuery("#gform_12").trigger("submit",[true]); }' /> <input type='hidden' name='gform_ajax' value='form_id=12&amp;title=&amp;description=&amp;tabindex=0' /> <input type='hidden' class='gform_hidden' name='is_submit_12' value='1' /> <input type='hidden' class='gform_hidden' name='gform_submit' value='12' /> <input type='hidden' class='gform_hidden' name='gform_unique_id' value='' /> <input type='hidden' class='gform_hidden' name='state_12' value='WyJbXSIsImU4MmE1N2RiNzRiMTQ1ZjVhOGQ3OWQwZmVkOTFkNjRiIl0=' /> <input type='hidden' class='gform_hidden' name='gform_target_page_number_12' id='gform_target_page_number_12' value='0' /> <input type='hidden' class='gform_hidden' name='gform_source_page_number_12' id='gform_source_page_number_12' value='1' /> <input type='hidden' name='gform_field_values' value='' /> </div> <p style="display: none !important;"><label>&#916;<textarea name="ak_hp_textarea" cols="45" rows="8" maxlength="100"></textarea></label><input type="hidden" id="ak_js" name="ak_js" value="229"/><script>document.getElementById( "ak_js" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() );</script></p></form> </div> <iframe style='display:none;width:0px;height:0px;' src='about:blank' name='gform_ajax_frame_12' id='gform_ajax_frame_12' title='This iframe contains the logic required to handle Ajax powered Gravity Forms.'></iframe> <script type='text/javascript'>gform.initializeOnLoaded( function() {gformInitSpinner( 12, 'https://activeforlife.com/content/plugins/gravityforms/images/spinner.svg' );jQuery('#gform_ajax_frame_12').on('load',function(){var contents = jQuery(this).contents().find('*').html();var is_postback = contents.indexOf('GF_AJAX_POSTBACK') >= 0;if(!is_postback){return;}var form_content = jQuery(this).contents().find('#gform_wrapper_12');var is_confirmation = jQuery(this).contents().find('#gform_confirmation_wrapper_12').length > 0;var is_redirect = contents.indexOf('gformRedirect(){') >= 0;var is_form = form_content.length > 0 && ! is_redirect && ! is_confirmation;var mt = parseInt(jQuery('html').css('margin-top'), 10) + parseInt(jQuery('body').css('margin-top'), 10) + 100;if(is_form){jQuery('#gform_wrapper_12').html(form_content.html());if(form_content.hasClass('gform_validation_error')){jQuery('#gform_wrapper_12').addClass('gform_validation_error');} else {jQuery('#gform_wrapper_12').removeClass('gform_validation_error');}setTimeout( function() { /* delay the scroll by 50 milliseconds to fix a bug in chrome */ jQuery(document).scrollTop(jQuery('#gform_wrapper_12').offset().top - mt); }, 50 );if(window['gformInitDatepicker']) {gformInitDatepicker();}if(window['gformInitPriceFields']) {gformInitPriceFields();}var current_page = jQuery('#gform_source_page_number_12').val();gformInitSpinner( 12, 'https://activeforlife.com/content/plugins/gravityforms/images/spinner.svg' );jQuery(document).trigger('gform_page_loaded', [12, current_page]);window['gf_submitting_12'] = false;}else if(!is_redirect){var confirmation_content = jQuery(this).contents().find('.GF_AJAX_POSTBACK').html();if(!confirmation_content){confirmation_content = contents;}setTimeout(function(){jQuery('#gform_wrapper_12').replaceWith(confirmation_content);jQuery(document).scrollTop(jQuery('#gf_12').offset().top - mt);jQuery(document).trigger('gform_confirmation_loaded', [12]);window['gf_submitting_12'] = false;wp.a11y.speak(jQuery('#gform_confirmation_message_12').text());}, 50);}else{jQuery('#gform_12').append(contents);if(window['gformRedirect']) {gformRedirect();}}jQuery(document).trigger('gform_post_render', [12, current_page]);} );} );</script>
[gravityforms id=11 title="false" description="false" ajax="true"]
<div class='gf_browser_chrome gform_wrapper gform_legacy_markup_wrapper' id='gform_wrapper_11' ><div id='gf_11' class='gform_anchor' tabindex='-1'></div><form method='post' enctype='multipart/form-data' target='gform_ajax_frame_11' id='gform_11' action='/pandemic-hockey-parent/#gf_11' > <div class='gform_body gform-body'><ul id='gform_fields_11' class='gform_fields top_label form_sublabel_below description_below'><li id="field_11_2" class="gfield field_sublabel_below field_description_below hidden_label gfield_visibility_visible" ><label class='gfield_label' for='input_11_2' >Name</label><div class='ginput_container ginput_container_text'><input name='input_2' id='input_11_2' type='text' value='' class='large' placeholder='Your name' aria-invalid="false" /> </div></li><li id="field_11_1" class="gfield email gfield_contains_required field_sublabel_below field_description_below hidden_label gfield_visibility_visible" ><label class='gfield_label' for='input_11_1' >Email<span class="gfield_required"><span class="gfield_required gfield_required_asterisk">*</span></span></label><div class='ginput_container ginput_container_email'> <input name='input_1' id='input_11_1' type='text' value='' class='large' placeholder='Your email address' aria-required="true" aria-invalid="false" /> </div></li><li id="field_11_4" class="gfield hidden scroll-subscriber field_sublabel_below field_description_below gfield_visibility_visible" ><label class='gfield_label' for='input_11_4' >Scroll Subscriber</label><div class='ginput_container ginput_container_text'><input name='input_4' id='input_11_4' type='text' value='' class='medium' aria-invalid="false" /> </div></li><li id="field_11_3" class="gfield field_sublabel_below field_description_below hidden_label gfield_visibility_visible" ><label class='gfield_label gfield_label_before_complex' >I&#039;m an educator, coach, or rec leader</label><div class='ginput_container ginput_container_checkbox'><ul class='gfield_checkbox' id='input_11_3'><li class='gchoice gchoice_11_3_1'> <input class='gfield-choice-input' name='input_3.1' type='checkbox' value='Yes, please also send me the biannual AfL Pro Newsletter for educators, coaches and rec leaders' id='choice_11_3_1' /> <label for='choice_11_3_1' id='label_11_3_1'>Yes, please also send me the biannual AfL Pro Newsletter for educators, coaches and rec leaders</label> </li></ul></div></li></ul></div> <div class='gform_footer top_label'> <input type='submit' id='gform_submit_button_11' class='gform_button button' value='Subscribe now' onclick='if(window["gf_submitting_11"]){return false;} window["gf_submitting_11"]=true; ' onkeypress='if( event.keyCode == 13 ){ if(window["gf_submitting_11"]){return false;} window["gf_submitting_11"]=true; jQuery("#gform_11").trigger("submit",[true]); }' /> <input type='hidden' name='gform_ajax' value='form_id=11&amp;title=&amp;description=&amp;tabindex=0' /> <input type='hidden' class='gform_hidden' name='is_submit_11' value='1' /> <input type='hidden' class='gform_hidden' name='gform_submit' value='11' /> <input type='hidden' class='gform_hidden' name='gform_unique_id' value='' /> <input type='hidden' class='gform_hidden' name='state_11' value='WyJbXSIsImU4MmE1N2RiNzRiMTQ1ZjVhOGQ3OWQwZmVkOTFkNjRiIl0=' /> <input type='hidden' class='gform_hidden' name='gform_target_page_number_11' id='gform_target_page_number_11' value='0' /> <input type='hidden' class='gform_hidden' name='gform_source_page_number_11' id='gform_source_page_number_11' value='1' /> <input type='hidden' name='gform_field_values' value='' /> </div> <p style="display: none !important;"><label>&#916;<textarea name="ak_hp_textarea" cols="45" rows="8" maxlength="100"></textarea></label><input type="hidden" id="ak_js" name="ak_js" value="65"/><script>document.getElementById( "ak_js" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() );</script></p></form> </div> <iframe style='display:none;width:0px;height:0px;' src='about:blank' name='gform_ajax_frame_11' id='gform_ajax_frame_11' title='This iframe contains the logic required to handle Ajax powered Gravity Forms.'></iframe> <script type='text/javascript'>gform.initializeOnLoaded( function() {gformInitSpinner( 11, 'https://activeforlife.com/content/plugins/gravityforms/images/spinner.svg' );jQuery('#gform_ajax_frame_11').on('load',function(){var contents = jQuery(this).contents().find('*').html();var is_postback = contents.indexOf('GF_AJAX_POSTBACK') >= 0;if(!is_postback){return;}var form_content = jQuery(this).contents().find('#gform_wrapper_11');var is_confirmation = jQuery(this).contents().find('#gform_confirmation_wrapper_11').length > 0;var is_redirect = contents.indexOf('gformRedirect(){') >= 0;var is_form = form_content.length > 0 && ! is_redirect && ! is_confirmation;var mt = parseInt(jQuery('html').css('margin-top'), 10) + parseInt(jQuery('body').css('margin-top'), 10) + 100;if(is_form){jQuery('#gform_wrapper_11').html(form_content.html());if(form_content.hasClass('gform_validation_error')){jQuery('#gform_wrapper_11').addClass('gform_validation_error');} else {jQuery('#gform_wrapper_11').removeClass('gform_validation_error');}setTimeout( function() { /* delay the scroll by 50 milliseconds to fix a bug in chrome */ jQuery(document).scrollTop(jQuery('#gform_wrapper_11').offset().top - mt); }, 50 );if(window['gformInitDatepicker']) {gformInitDatepicker();}if(window['gformInitPriceFields']) {gformInitPriceFields();}var current_page = jQuery('#gform_source_page_number_11').val();gformInitSpinner( 11, 'https://activeforlife.com/content/plugins/gravityforms/images/spinner.svg' );jQuery(document).trigger('gform_page_loaded', [11, current_page]);window['gf_submitting_11'] = false;}else if(!is_redirect){var confirmation_content = jQuery(this).contents().find('.GF_AJAX_POSTBACK').html();if(!confirmation_content){confirmation_content = contents;}setTimeout(function(){jQuery('#gform_wrapper_11').replaceWith(confirmation_content);jQuery(document).scrollTop(jQuery('#gf_11').offset().top - mt);jQuery(document).trigger('gform_confirmation_loaded', [11]);window['gf_submitting_11'] = false;wp.a11y.speak(jQuery('#gform_confirmation_message_11').text());}, 50);}else{jQuery('#gform_11').append(contents);if(window['gformRedirect']) {gformRedirect();}}jQuery(document).trigger('gform_post_render', [11, current_page]);} );} );</script>